The monkey made me do it

It's a good thing they're cute

You have to imagine this.

I decided to bring both punk furry demons with me up to Everett, since it was a gorgeous sunny day and I had a couple of errands up there (one of which being a private agility training session for punk furball #1) and they looked like they were developing cabin fever. For future reference, Everett is about an hour from my house, and I was going to be up there for most of the day.

I got a big-ass coffee. A mocha. After a couple of sips, I decided to check out one of the local parks since I was early for my errands. I put both dogs on leashes, stuck some plastic bags in my pockets, grabbed my giant, steaming hot cup of coffee, and set out. We did great for a long while, and then...(insert ominous music) Rooster had to poo. He did his thing, then I switched my leashes onto one wrist while I held my bucket-like lava-hot cup of coffee with the same hand, and scooped the poo with the other. So. I'm bent over, both dogs controlling the hand holding the coffee, and not really paying attention to the hairy miscreants. Of course Rooster decides it's a great time to play with Monkey. He's just relieved himself, it's a sunny day, the birds are singing, his owner is marginally happy since she's got a giant cup of yummy caffiene.

His 80 lbs. of happy spastic dancing jerked my hand and I instinctively pulled back and clenched my grip on my beloved beverage, shooting off the lid and launching the entire contents on top of my head. I yelled (did I mention it was a little warm?), and stood up, which transfered the contents down my jacket and DRENCHED my jeans. I then called my dogs names that made me very happy afterwards that they don't understand English. They slunk back to the car (they CAN understand intonation, after all) and I found every spare napkin lodged in every cranny of my car and attempted to mop myself up. I eventually went to a different park and snuck in the restroom to wash my hair in the sink, but it didn't help much. I spent the entire day reeking of old coffee and with half of my hair a crispy, tangled mess. When I was finally able to get home it took three showers to get the 'do back to normal again.

But the good news is that Monkey will soon be able to walk a balance beam. You know, for the times when I really need her to walk one.

posted by LadyJay @ 10:39 AM